The 2010 Boxing Awards cereomy

With 2010 coming to a close, it's time for the end of the year awards and everyone's thinking about them. Things like Fight of the year, Fighter of the Year, KO of the year, Upset of the Year and Round of the Year will be the words on everyone's lips over the coming few weeks however, unlike most awards, the ones you are going to be reading about here, are a little different. We like to do things with a bit of a twist and are going to be looking some awards of a different kind.

Firstly, our opening award-
Stinker of the year:
The award goes to Audley Harrison's shorts during his fight with David Haye. As everyone in the arena found out, they stunk terrible as Harrison literally dropped his bowels on the way to the ring and was so worried about the brown coming out that he didn't throw anything of note incase he emptied whatever he had left.

As has been said by everyone who's seen it Audley Harrison no showed, as many expected he did nothing during his fight at all except getting used as target practise for a short time in the 3^rd round. In front of around 20,000 in the arena and plenty watching at home on Sky Box office. This brilliantly links into our second award.

Mug(s) of the year:
This award goes to about 700,000 of you (yes you!) who paid for the aforementioned Haye v Harrison “fight”. If you're a true boxing fan and expected anything other than the farce this was you deserve the label mug, if however you were someone from outside of the usual boxing fan, then you have learnt a valuable lesson. Audley Harrison isn't a boxer, he's just a very strange man.

Although we here at boxingbloggingatitsoddest like seeing Audley beaten up as much as the next man theirs only so much Aud anyone can take. Instead we want to look at more deserving fighters. Those that stand out for something interesting, such as being an idiot, or being made to eat you're own words.

The idiot of the Year:
This award goes to a fighter who called his opponent an idiot...then got stopped. Henry Lundy would call John Molina Jr “an idiot” going into their fight back in July, before being dropped by Molina in the 8^th and stopped in the 11^th. Perhaps funnier however was the fact that Lundy claimed Molina wouldn't be as good as his dad, foolishly assuming John was the son of John John Molina.

Thank you for that “Hammerin' Hank”, you've shown you truly do deserve an award. As did a man with a silly name. Although funny names in sports are nothing new, they are something that will never get old. There was quite a few nominations for this award so we've had to make several trophies to hand out to different fighters.

The “Long” silly name award:
This is an award for the longest silly name, and although the career of the fighter does go back he still has a silly name. George Tahdooahnippah, the unbeaten Super Middleweight from the USA has been relatively busy this year wondering what his name would be worth in a game of Scrabble, though sadly George scrabble words have a maximum length of 9 letters.

The “Short” silly name award:
When your name is the same as that of a form of oral sex you're unlucky, but for BJ Flores it's earned him this award. It could be the closest he gets to a meaningful title after his loss to Danny Green in an IBO Cruiserweight title fight.

Staying on the subject of names we have 2 more name awards. This time it's for the imposters in boxing awards. For these awards you need to have the same, or similar name to either a celebrity (for the celeb version of this award) or to another boxer, in the past this second award would likely have been for Cory and Corrie Sanders.

Celeb imposter of the year:
This award goes to Australian fighter Brad Pitt who has gone from 2006 Commonwealth gold medal winner to erm...winning this illustrative “Celeb imposter” award. Hope you enjoy it Brad.

Boxing imposter of the year:
Tomas Adamek, no not the Polish fighter who's now campaigning as a heavyweight but the Czech Republics Light Heavyweight who is now wondering how to become Tomasz Adamek and collect much larger pay packets.

As well as names and mouths boxers can have a few too many wrinkles. They can on far too long and seem to do it for no apparent reason in places like Mexico and New Zealand. This brings us to our ageist award.

Pack it in you old bugger award:
In his 50's and having just lost his unbeaten record that dates back to the 1990's Hassan Chitsaz really should hang them up. He had a great run to rack up a perfect 19-0 (19) record until being stopped quickly in a fight with John Ellis.

Finally the last few awards for the year.

Pensioner beater of the year:
It's hard to fault David Haye for picking up easy paydays whilst avoiding the Klitschko's and with victories over John Ruiz and Audley Harrison this year gave his opponents an average age of OVER 38. Maybe if Hassan wants to reject his Pack it in you old bugger award he could face the “Hayemaker” next year.

Where's the Buffet award:
The joke about heavyweights getting heavier was shown by the king of the fat bastards this year. The winner being a guy who's average weight for his 2 fights this year was OVER 400 lbs, and unsurprisingly he was stopped twice in the opening round. Dustin Nichols weighed in at an impressive 398 to face Deontay Wilder then an even larger 425 when he fought Ernest Mazyck in October. It's worth adding Mazyck himself weighed 321 for that fight which wins the combined “All you can eat award”.

Thank you for joining us for our awards ceremony, I hope to see some of your gorgeous faces next year folks.

Who will David Haye face next?

Whether you’re a boxing fan or not, you’ll surely have been caught up in some of the hype one side of the Atlantic or the other. Here in Blighty we had David Haye v Audley Harrison and in the US the Cowboy Stadium was the centre of attention with Manny Pacquaio v Antonio Margarito being the talking point. Which ever country you were in, you saw only one fighter winning their fight, and although Margarito put up much better fight than Harrison the bookies got them both spot on.

As I’m British I probably heard more about the Harrison v Haye farce than the other fight (which I watched and thoroughly enjoyed). So with it being Britain I’m going to focus this piece on the fight we had. Or rather the relatively legalised assault we had as calling it a fight would probably be breaching trade description act. Audley, as many seemed to think before hand, lacked the fighters instinct and after landing a meagre 1 shot in the opening 2 rounds was thoroughly beaten in the 3^rd. What good will come of this? Well aside from the fact Audley Harrison has almost certainly been beaten into retirement in front of one of the largest viewing publics in recent British history.

Although it was probably the worst heavyweight title fight in recent memory, and that’s including the likes of Wladamir Klitschko v Sultan Ibragimov it has allowed boxing fans, at last, to realise that David Haye is a hypocrite. The man who said he was going to tear through the heavyweight division facing only meaningful opponents has instead faced a nobody. Not for the first time in his career, and it probably won’t be the last. Sadly though Haye has a knack of fighting older menm varying skill levels but older men. His last few opponents have been on the wrong side of 35, with Audley being 39, the most extreme age of those “old” fighters Haye has been facing in recent years.

With this in mind, I’ve come to the assumption Haye will be looking for another older fight to feast on next and decided to come up with a short list of my own. Don’t worry, about this giving Haye and Adam Booth ideas, I’m sure they already have a similar short list.

Tony Thompson-age 39, record 34-2 (22)
Thompson may not actually be far off the mark of plausibility. Thompson did spar with Haye in the build up for the Harrison fight, he was reported to have dropped Haye in sparring, allowing the fight to be sold on that. A former title challenger who has maintained a high ranking is 30-1 in his last 31 fights with his only stoppage loss coming against Wladamir Klitschko.

Juan Carlos Gomez-age 37, record 48-2-0-1 (36)
Like Haye, Gomez was a former Cruiserweight champion (holding the WBC belt from 1998 to 2002). Although once hugely talented Gomez has done the same thing as many modern day heavy’s and used the division as an excuse for an ever growing waist band. At 200lbs he was a fine athlete but now coming to the ring around 250 he looks visibly fat. Like Thompson (see above) Gomez has had a world heavyweight title fight, losing in the 9^th round to Vitali Klitschko in 2009 though is on a 4 fight unbeaten streak against journeymen.

Evander Holyfield-age 48, record 43-10-2 (28)
Perhaps the heavyweight grandpa, but still a legendary name in the sport and a man who would happily sign to fight Haye any day. Although Holyfield is shot, he’s still fighting and has a fight against Sherman Williams in a few weeks coming up. Many, including myself, felt that Holyfield deserved the decision against Nikolai Valuev back in December 2008 in a WBA world title fight, and had Holyfield gotten the decision Haye may never have won the title. This fight could be sold as “Setting the record straight”, though it’ll be seen as “Haye beats up pensioner”, hard to see a bigger American name than Holyfield however and a unification fight of sorts (Holyfield holds the lightly regarded WBF title).

Antonio Tarver-age 41, record 28-6 (19)
The former Light Heavyweight champion announced his move to the heavyweight division in October with a wide points win over Nagy Aguilera. Having held various titles at 175lbs he’s trying to follow in the footsteps of rival Roy Jones Jr and take a title off one of the big men and Haye is the smallest of the big men. It’s worth noting that Tarver is pretty much the same size as Haye, admittedly he weighed 12lbs heavier in his last fight though is just 1 inch shorter and would give away 3 inches in reach. A possible match that could earn Haye some American focus.

Jean Marc Mormeck-age 38, record 35-4 (22)
A rematch of their Cruiserweight contest from back in November 2007 would this time see Haye calling the shots, rather than needing to go over to Paris for the fight. Though the interest in the contest is minimal, Mormeck is currently campaigning as a Heavyweight and was a former undisputed champion at Cruiserweight. From the eyes of those involved it could make a lot of sense, allowing Mormeck to retire on a nice payday in front of 20,000 in Britain.

David Tua-age 37, record 51-3-2 (43)
12 months ago internet forums were genuinely calling for this fight, the fan friendly Tua, a KO machine from New Zealand was on the comeback trail and a fight with Haye was almost made for fans. Though since then Tua has shown he’s no long the KO machine he once was. A very controversial draw with former Haye victim Monte Barrett last time out showed that Tua was what most 37 year old heavyweights are, washed up. Barrett dropped Tua in the 12^th round, for the first time in Tua’s career he was decked. As a fighter he has managed to only get 1 world title fight and that was over a decade ago (a points loss to Lennox Lewis), perhaps he deserves another, their has been less deserving opponents (such as Harrison) after all.

Oliver McCall-age 45, record 54-10-0-2 (37)
Haye has been called the hardest hitting in the division by some of his fans, McCall has generally been called the toughest man in the division. What happens when an immoveable object meets an irresistible force? McCall will also bring some British history to the ring. In 1994 he stopped Lennox Lewis in the second round, in The Arena, in Wembley, he has also faced (and lost) to Frank Bruno and Lewis in a rematch. The rematch is best known for McCall having a mental break down, though neither the hard hitting Bruno nor Lewis could drop McCall, can Haye do what they couldn’t?

Hassan Chitsaz-age 52, record 19-1 (19)
The oldest professional heavyweight in the world today, a KO machine who scored 19 straight stoppages in the opening 2 rounds before he was beaten recently in the opening few seconds. Haye’s work of retiring fighters will work brilliantly against the Iranian born “assassin”, though it’s unlikely that the WBA will allow their title to be put on the line, that wouldn’t stop the fight from being a non-title fight. The fighting public would see more fight from Chitsaz than they saw from Harrison recently, so lets not ignore this possibility, after all Haye needs to take on some punchers, a guy who has a 95% KO record can’t hit that softly…can he?




All though these fights are tongue in I wouldn’t write them off altogether, Haye does like the older men, and although he is mandated to face Ruslan Chagaev, theirs no saying Chagaev will be able to fight in the UK due to medical worries. Maybe, just maybe, Hayes trend of old men will continue.